Getting Through The Tough Times of Fatherhood

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As men, we are expected to be strong, to control our emotions, and handle whatever comes our way.  Well the part society didn’t seem to consider is that we are actually human. Humans get sad, angry, frustrated, and yes…depressed.  While life is overall wonderful, we all experience ups and downs.

In this video, I’m going to share with you some of the techniques & tips I have used to get through the tough times .

This video is in partnership with Fatherly.  We’ll put a link to Fatherly in the description so be sure to check them out.

Every person experiences tough times so know that you are not alone.  You may have financial hardship, difficulties with your career, relationship troubles, health issues, or something else affecting you in a big way.

Just know there are things you can do to improve your situation.  Now…change requires action. I’m going to repeat that: CHANGE REQUIRES ACTION.  If you don’t take action, you are not even giving yourself the opportunity for change.

#1: Acknowledge It – You can’t bury your head in the sand and expect something is going to go away. Acknowledging there is an issue is so important.  Feel the anger, the pain, the loss, whatever it is you have inside.  Let it out:  cry, yell or even just talk about it.   Be sure not to judge your feelings.  Give yourself permission to have feelings and acknowledge the issue you are facing.

#2: Seek Support – We men often have difficulty admitting we need help.  While we might be able to often solve problems on our own, there are situations where it’s just too much. But we are concerned we might be judged or think it’s some kind of weakness to ask for help.  If you have tried to solve the problem on your own and can’t, it is absolutely ok to ask for help.  Lean on your family and friends for support. If you feel you can’t lean on family or friends, try a support group.  Whether locally in person or an online support group, there may be resources and people dealing with the same things you are.

#3 –  Get Professional Help – There are experts in any kind of issue we face. My mother passed away years ago and it was so painful.  I had never experienced such a loss.  My heart literally hurt.  Per the recommendation of my father, I ended up going to grief counseling. I learned so much from talking about my feelings with a professional.  You may not think someone else can help you, but they can.  I felt like it really helped me get through the hardest time in my life.

#4:  Be Good To Your Body – If you are experiencing issues in your head, try taking care of your body. You need to make sure you are getting plenty of sleep, exercising, and eating healthy foods however don’t go the other direction and do it too much.  We can either neglect these things when we are going through something difficult or submerse ourselves in them and do it too much. I can also say that for me, reducing my alcohol consumption had a big impact on me.  In addition to simply feeling physically better overall, I noticed a big reduction in my mood swings.  My lows are less frequent and when they do happen, they are much shorter in duration.

#5: Practice Gratitude – When you are down it can be really hard to think of something positive. But remember, change requires action.  It can be as simple as you were able to put your feet on the floor this morning.  You are able to breathe, or you have clean water.  Yes it can be that basic. Make a gratitude journal and write down 3 things you are grateful for and why right when you get up in the morning and right before you go to sleep at night.  You begin to train your brain to focus on the positive things in your life rather than the negative.

Here’s the deal and I’m going to sum it up for you.  We all experience troubles in our life.  We need to acknowledge it, feel it, get support, and take action. When you do these things, you get through the down times much quicker. Also, if it’s something you can change, you need to change it.  If it’s something you can’t change, then all you can do is change your attitude towards it.

I’d love to hear from you.  Have you experienced a really difficult time?  Can you point to something specific you did that helped you through it?  Leave your feedback in the comments below.


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