I Am Jealous of Our New Baby – New Dad Jealousy Is Real

baby Mar 14, 2023
I Am Jealous of Our New Baby

Have you ever felt jealous when you see your baby in the arms of your partner? Do you feel as though your partner is more focused on the baby than they are on you? Are you ashamed to admit that you’re a dad jealous of a baby?

If so, you’re not alone. The phenomenon of fathers being jealous of their babies is normal. It’s a common emotion that can arise when you first become a father. You may feel resentful or envious of the attention and care your partner is giving to the baby, and it can lead to unpleasant feelings.

Nonetheless, there’s nothing to be guilty about. It’s a normal part of the transition to parenthood, and it’s important to recognize that these “father jealous of child” feelings are valid and can be resolved.

Why New Dads Feel Jealous

First of all, you should understand the possible reasons for new dad jealousy:


As new parents, it can be easy to get lost in the whirlwind of caring for a newborn. This is especially true for fathers who often feel like they’re being pushed to the sidelines while their partner and baby bond.

As a result, dads may start to feel jealous — both of their partner and their child. After all, there’s only so much attention that can be given out at one time and dad often gets ignored or forgotten about in those first few weeks and months of the baby’s life.


Insecurities can also play a role in newborn jealousy. A new dad may worry that he is not as good a parent as his partner, or even have fears about being replaced by the baby in terms of their partner’s love and attention.

As such, a new dad may feel jealous of the baby because they think their partner will love the infant more than them. It can be hard to handle, especially since new parents are already in a vulnerable emotional state.

Lack of Control

There will also be feelings of helplessness and lack of control that can lead to feeling jealous. New dads may want to be involved in the parenting process but, due to circumstances such as shift work or being away from home, they are often not able to be around as much as they would like. This can create a sense of insecurity and jealousy when other people step into their role of providing care for the baby.


Additionally, societal pressure and expectations can be overwhelming for new dads. Dads are often expected to be strong, stoic, and unfailingly supportive of their families. But these expectations can create a feeling of jealousy in new dads, as they may feel that their own needs and wants are being overlooked or forgotten.

Relationships Changes

Lastly, the changing dynamic of a dad’s relationship with their partner can lead to a jealous dad. When a baby is born, it’s natural for the mother to take center stage as she devotes her energy and attention to caring for their newborn. This can leave a dad feeling like he’s been sidelined or that his partner no longer values him in the same way since becoming parents.

How Can Dads Deal With Jealousy?

It’s important to understand that dads being jealous of a child isn’t a bad thing in itself. While it may feel uncomfortable, it’s a normal reaction to the change in family dynamics that comes with having a new baby. The key is to recognize your feelings and find healthy ways to work through them.

Acknowledge Your Feelings

It’s important to accept your feelings of jealousy and give yourself permission to feel them. Acknowledging your emotions without judgment can help you move forward in a healthy way. The important thing is to recognize that you are experiencing these feelings and to make sure not to act on them in ways that could hurt your family.

Spend Quality Time With the Baby

As a new dad, it’s easy to feel jealous when your partner spends so much quality time with the baby. This can be especially true during those times when you feel like you’re missing out on all the fun.

The truth is, however, that spending quality time with your little one is an essential part of being a great dad. So, even if it isn’t always convenient or feels uncomfortable at first, make sure to invest in building strong relationships and special memories with your newborn.

Practice Self Care

Taking time for yourself each day to do something that makes you happy — such as reading a book or playing an instrument — will help you better manage the emotions associated with jealousy. Additionally, exercising regularly helps release endorphins which can improve mood and well-being.

Communicate With Your Partner

It’s important to communicate openly with your partner about how you’re feeling. You don’t have to bottle up your emotions or feel ashamed of them — your partner will understand, and they may even be feeling similar jealous feelings themselves.

Seek Support From Other New Dads

Support systems are invaluable for new parents. Talking to other new dads can help you understand and cope with your feelings of jealousy in a healthy way. Sharing experiences with others who are going through similar situations can be cathartic and it also gives you the opportunity to better understand what you’re feeling.

Learn How To Deal With New Dad Jealousy

It’s normal to feel jealous of a new baby, and it isn’t something you should ignore. Recognizing the signs of jealousy in yourself is valuable in dealing with jealousy as a new dad, as is talking to your partner about how you’re feeling. You can also take steps such as spending quality time with your partner or seeking support from other dads.

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